Last night (Wednesday) I listened to my youngest daughter being interviewed on Bush Radio, a local community radio station, about her musical career. Her stage name is Luh’ra and she is a singer/guitarist who often performs alone but also with other musicians.
She had to compile a musical playlist for this radio appearance, which lasted two hours and consisted of some sort of an interview, but more of a chat, with a lot of music being played in between. The music all came from her playlist.
She started off by sharing some of the musical influences that she received from her parents and I was amazed by her selection, starting with Abdullah Ibrahim’s The Wedding to Jonathan Butler’s jazz stuff and Judith Sephuma, among others.
I realised then that, as parents, we are not always aware of the influence we have on our children. We listen to music, but we don’t often consider that our children could be listening too. Sometimes we speak about things without considering that our children could possibly understand what we are talking about. Imagine if my daughter said that the only musical influences she received from us were pop or bubble-gum music? Not that there is anything wrong with those forms of music, but one would like to believe that one’s influence has been a bit more profound.
More importantly, we do not often think about the outside influences on our children.
Years ago, about five of my friends and our families used to go camping every year-end. The five- or six-day holiday always included some musical performances. At one such performance, my friend’s then five- or six-year-old son said he wanted to do a song. He proceeded to perform a song by Eminen, complete with profanities. We were all shocked and did not know how to respond.
But we realised that, while we can try to keep tabs on our children as closely as possible, it is not always easy to protect them from societal influences.
In a world where technology is so easily accessible, it has become even more difficult for parents to make sure that their children are only influenced by things that are acceptable for their age levels, among others.
But while listening to my daughter’s interview, I realised that, while we have always tried to have as open a relationship as possible with our daughters, we will never know everything about them. We can always discover new things about them.
At another one of our annual camps, my other daughter sang a song and I realised for the first time that she could actually sing. I had never heard her sing before.
Sometimes I look at my grandson and I wonder about the challenges he will face growing up and the pressures he will be put under throughout his life. At just over a year, he already watches television and appears to like certain programmes.
Technology has become a part of our lives and will determine, in many ways, whether our children will be employable one day. The key is not to deprive him of technology but to find ways in which technology can help to support certain values in him and other children.
It has become more difficult for parents who believe in controlling and isolating their children, whici is not a bad thing, but it has also become more difficult for the rest of us.
Parent should take an active interest in nurturing their children from an early age. What we invest in them when they are young will eventually pay off when they are older.
Ps. Luh’ra will be performing with Jitsvinger tomorrow (Friday) at 6pm at the Book Lounge in Roeland Street, Cape Town. For more information, email booklounge @gmail.com
